Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
