Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I wish i was in the wii world.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
