this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
