Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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