I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
her vagine was all disorganized.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Randomize