i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
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