absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
