i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
