They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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