your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
