Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
there was a trapeze. enough said
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
