Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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