these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
