VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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