I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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