Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
