and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
