Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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