if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
