How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
