okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
