I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize