Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
