Porn is love you can see.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
