Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
