the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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