Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
