Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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