How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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