Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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