Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
