yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
