Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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