dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
