I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize