if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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