This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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