If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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