Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize