nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
