hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
