Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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