I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
