did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize