For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize