Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize