the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
