She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
