you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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