Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
