How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
